Friday, August 04, 2006

T.G.I.F !!!

I am SO glad it's Friday! This has been the work week from hell. Why? Because our budget season officially kicked off this past week. And of course we are already two days behind, but that's mostly because my boss is an idiot. I just don't get people. The budget is a horrible nightmare from beginning to end (in late November). I sit in these meetings - where I know EXACTLY how much these big wigs make - and listen to their nonsense. And every stinking time I walk out of there KNOWING I could SO own my own business and be successful. It's like the time warp/parallel universe from hell. They are truly out of their minds, and get paid like kings. (Oh yeah, they're all men.) I tried to jazz it up as I sent out each head honcho's budget template for his department. I had cute jazzy subject lines like "Better than Christmas!" and "Pick a number, any number!" and wrote some seriously hilarious budget instruction for each a-hole. Things like: "The due date is (blah blah), but of course earlier is always better and if you're the first person to turn your packet in we'll only cut your spending by 75% instead of 85%." or "Successful completion of the template will save you weeks of me stalking you outside the mens restroom". Did I get a single "Ha Ha" from any of them??Of course not. Just snippy, biting emails. But I really didn't expect any less.

All this "excitement" has made my boss even MORE pleasant than his usual pain in the ass self. He was so bad today I started taking up a collection from my coworkers to hire a hooker for him. We're thinking she will have to be blind and deaf, and incredibly desperate. Naturally I checked with my coworker whose husband owns his own stripper service. And of course "he knows people". Sweet. It can only help.

So, to continue this boring dribble about our insane workplace this weekend is our annual family picnic. What's worse than 50 hours a week with total goobs? Spending your Saturday with them too! The past couple of years the "event" has been at our local waterpark. That was always fun because it's so large and crowded with other people you rarely see your coworkers. This year our completely out of touch Marketing department has discovered something even better than seeing all your coworkers in swimwear - A Cowboy Town. (Click on the link, trust me. It's worth it.) What's even worse is that no one I know at work has even heard of this "theme park". I just don't see how anyplace with "Kick a Poo" Lake doesn't make the headlines constantly. The agenda for the 2pm - 10pm event tomorrow includes cowboy singing, cowboy magic shows and multiple cowboy gunfights. They also have human hamster ball races and watergun fights. If I shoot a coworker it will not be with water. Needless to say Brent and I are not attending. Even to take pictures of the insanity. I seriously wish I was making this up, but sadly I am not. At least all the ridiculous posters will be down next week, and all the idiotic cowboy hats and hobby horses will be distributed.

Other news around's sales tax free weekend! Our sales tax is a whopping 9.25% (it was 9.75% in the suburb we moved from). We don't have a state income tax, so they rip us with sales tax. This is the first time we've ever had this in TN, and I was super excited at first - until I realized it's only on computers, clothes, and school supplies. I was really hoping furniture would apply!! Either way, I am going to go and get a new pair of running shoes tomorrow and maybe a couple of outfits just to take advantage of the tax break. Here is an honest-to-God phone conversation I overheard between a coworker and her (admittantly very strange) mom:

Coworker: "Yeah, I think I'll go buy a few outfits this weekend"
Coworker: "No, it's only on school supplies, clothes and computers. To help people with kids going back to school."
Coworker: "No, I don't think a pillow would qualify."
Coworker: "Well, because it's not a school supply."
Coworker: "Seriously mom. A pillow is not a school supply."

Running - It has been HOT!! Every day the temp is 99 on our way home. Ugh!! Just standing outside you break a sweat. Since we can't go home for lunch now we've been going to the gym instead. It's actually a great break. I can fit 4 miles in including a warm up and cool down, and still have plenty of time to change. It's nice to get back into a routine again. I'm starting to feel very settled. We've even started getting up at 5 am to take Pippin on his 1 mile walk, which he LOVES! We also discovered on our am walks that you can see the Nashville skyline about two block from here! So, this week I already have about 15 miles, before tomorrow's long run. Everything is finally starting to get back on track! Last month I only had 45 miles, there were some weeks this past winter when I had that many miles!

So, tomorrow we're going to get up and run, then meet a friend at the dog park (just a half a mile from here!!), work on the house, and go out with some friends tomorrow night. Today we got a lot of rain this afternoon and it really cooled things off. After we ate it was so pleasant we decided to take Pippin to the dog park. We ended up having a blast and Pippin did, too. I gave him a bath last night, and now he's covered in mud but we all had fun so who cares??

Have a great weekend!!



At 11:04 PM, Blogger Firefly's Running said...

It's so good that you are finally getting really settled in your new house.

At 3:35 AM, Blogger plods said...

No, no, Rachel,... YOU have a great weekend!
Yeeeeeeehah! ;-)

At 6:02 AM, Blogger Susan said...

I can't wait to see how it goes with your boss and the hooker. When is that post?

At 8:25 AM, Blogger ShoreTurtle said...

You're too funny!

You've been too busy. I've missed reading about the adventures of Brent, Rachel and Pippin!

At 9:09 AM, Blogger Cory said...

Speakinawhich, Pip's page has not been updated in a while. Whaddup, yo?

At 11:42 AM, Blogger Running Jayhawk said...

Your sales tax is INSANE!! You guys have been so busy lately...we miss ya over here in the blogosphere! Glad that you've both posted!! But i'm with Cory here, we need some Pippin love!!

At 10:41 AM, Anonymous Jay T said...

Are you and Brent the only sane people at your workplace? It sure sounds that way.

No, wait, the woman telling her mom a pillow isn't a school supply has enough sense to realize that, so I guess she counts too. :-)

At 2:31 PM, Blogger Dori said...

Funny post! Office dynamics--ugh. Makes me grateful I don't have a job. Hope you find a great pair of tax-free running shoes.

At 5:26 PM, Blogger jeanne said...

seriously, you HAVE TO BE making this stuff up about your office!!! Or you'd better start writing scripts and sending them to the makers of the OFFICE. OH my god, I would definitely shoot someone!! I love your budget templates too. If you sent me that i would laugh my ass off! instead, we get boring e-mails saying "fill in the blanks." and of course all the categories are wrong.
it's always something!

At 6:24 AM, Blogger PLANET3RRY said...

Guy has his own stripper service... how often does he bring "his work home"

I am so glad that I don't have to hang out with my coworkers over the weekends. A couple of them are okay, but I don't think that I would be a model citizen for them. First of all, 80% think that I am nuts for Running and working out at lunch each day.

okay running 4 miles in 94 degree, high humidity is kind of crazy...

At 12:31 PM, Blogger Just12Finish said...

Oh Rae, I trusted you. I clicked the link. I read about "cedar outhouses". I hit the back button. When can I trust you again?!

At 5:54 PM, Blogger David said...

I am glad you guys (and especially Pippin) are all settled in and loving the new neighborhood.
As for that bitching you've got going on about the jerks at work ... you wrote about your future Ms. Determination: start your own company!

At 9:51 AM, Blogger Cliff said...

I can't stop laughing but at the same time i feel sorry for u :O...

..i hope misery loves company b/c my company is about the same way. can management dont' get it :)..

We need a pic of pippin in mud..

At 1:23 PM, Blogger E-Speed said...

wow I can't believe you didn't want to go wear a cowboy hat and ride hobby horses all day ;)

Sounds like things are settling in for you at home!

Glad your running is getting back to normal!

At 2:56 PM, Blogger D said...

You need to post those conversations more often. They're hilarious!


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